Finding Peace in the Storm: How I Handle My Depression
November 1, 2018
What does it mean to be happy? Do things make us happy? Do other people? What is it that makes us truly happy?
Finding true happiness in this world is not easy. So much negativty lurks around every corner we search. This negativity can blind us sometimes from our true paths in life.
Depression makes the weight of this struggle hard to bear. We face the world on a much lower level than others start at. A place we don’t want to be stuck in but struggle to find our way up.
It’s Out of Our Hands
Dealing with depression is not something you can just “get over”. It isn’t something you can hide from either.
I feel like there is a common misconseption about people who struggle with this. People who don’t struggle with it or have have a hard time understanding it is not something we can just push to the side. It isn’t something we can just turn off with a switch.
We can’t get rid of it completely. Sure medication can help, therapy could do wonders, but you are forever chained to whatever caused this spiral-effect in the first place.
Admitting that I have depression has been one of the hardest things I have had to do. It is not easy telling all of you about what I have been through. It is a part of my life I strive to hide from others. A side of me I never want people to think twice about me for.
But I have made it a priority in my life to not allow it to control my life. I can stand up and take action by doing things that help me get through my tough times. But I know it will never be something I can completly push out of my life.
Suffering in Silence
I think the scariest thing about depression is that we suffer in silence. We avoid allowing others to know what is going on in fear of being judged or ostracized. This is why we feel so alone.
I have fallen victim to this for too long now. Even still to this day I struggle to share my feelings with people close to me. It is not an easy obstacle to overcome after doing it for so many years.
Picking Up the Pieces
When one is struggling with depression, it is hard for us to look at the positive. We become so consumed with what is weighing us down rather than what could help us get back up.
For 6 years, I was consumed by everything I was constantly struggling with. The haunting memory of what I went through and how it affected who I was followed me around.
I was going to therapy some of that time and it helped but never took it away completely. That was the hardest part for me to realize. I was caught up in the idea that because I was going to therapy I was all better.
But I realized I wasn’t doing the things I needed to do to help myself out of this black hole.
How to Find Peace in the Storm
It took me awhile to get a handle on things in my life. But I can now say that I don’t let my depression control me. I do things that help me suppress it when it comes along.
Here are some ways that I use that you could try if you are struggling with depression or know someone who is:
Write it all down. By putting all my thoughts and feelings on paper, I am able to gather it all in one place rather than going in different directions. I can better understand what is affecting me the most.
Do one thing during the day that you enjoy. Whatever activity it is I know that it will relax me and will allow me to focus on myself. Even if it is just enjoying a cup of coffee!
Keep yourself busy throughout the day. These days it is not that hard to keep busy having three youngsters. Before 3 kids, I would have to make up things for myself to do like organizing and cleaning. Keeping busy takes time away from allowing my thoughts to overwhelm me.
Pray. By giving everything up to God, I dont feel alone. While I realize not everyone believes in doing this, this is just what works for me. But if this is something you do or want to, it can be a very powerful tool in the healing process.
Getting some fresh air. Since becoming a stay at home mom, I have had to push myself to get out. It isn’t easy anymore to do this. Now that I have three young kids, they need fresh air too. So it is important for all of us to spend some time outside. I feel alot better when I am able to realize there is a beautiful world outside of my house.
Accepting and loving yourself. This can be a tough one and is for me at times. I haven’t always so accepting of who I am. But I remind myself everyday that I am not perfect and I am doing the best that I can. I am a great mom and I love who I am today. When you are happy with yourself, your confidence and ability to find happiness is much higher than it would be if you didn’t. Try writing down all the qualities you love about yourself. It might give you some perspective on how you really see yourself.
Find the support you need. By surrounding myself with people who love, care about me, and support me, I am able to realize that I am NOT alone in this struggle. It is always a fear we have that people won’t accept us or see us differently knowing we struggle with depression. But if we are honest to the ones who truly care, we won’t be alone.
Relate to someone else who struggles as well. Finding that one person who knows exactly what you are going through becomes a pretty powerful tool. I think for people like me, it at least helps me in realizing I am not the only one that deals with this. You can also gain a different perspective on what you are struggling with by hearing what the other person is going through.
Don’t allow your depression to consume your life. I know the effects firsthand. While managing it is no easy task, remember that you aren’t alone in this struggle.
You are doing the best that you can. Don’t let this control the way you live your life. You deserve happiness and peace.
You are STRONG. You have gotten this far don’t give up yet.
You are worth it more than you know.
*If you or know someone that is struggling with depression, don’t wait to get the help you/they need. There are resources out there. But I am always here if you need someone to listen. Email me or message me on my facebook page. This isn’t something you should have to go through alone.